‘Motivation’

 Here are 5 “Challenges” for you to put into practice.  These challenges helped me to believe that I was a strong person and fully capable to overcome binge eating disorder. 

 1. Challenge yourself to find something that makes you happy and do it. 

What makes you feel the happiest? 
Writing, reading, being with friends, talking on the phone, putting on an outfit that makes you feel fabulous, exercising, listening to music, singing, buying new makeup, getting your nails and toes done, scrapbooking, cleaning, organizing, sending a card to someone, looking at old pictures, playing with your pet, etc.

2. Challenge yourself to learn or do something new. 

Is there a class that you’ve always wanted to take?
What about something that you’ve always wanted to know more about?
Do you want to make more friends in your area?  Why not set up a bunco group?
Do you want a new hobby?

3. Challenge yourself to focus on your future instead of your past.

This is one of my favorites because when I struggled to first stop bingeing, it was so hard for me.  I constantly thought of the past and my struggles and the fact that I was scared since I had binged for so long.  I found that focusing on the good I would gain from overcoming binge eating disorder really helped me.

After a couple of successes of overcoming a binge, I slipped and found myself turning to food.  I binged.  After the binge, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much of a failure I was.  How was I ever going to beat a whole disorder when I couldn’t even resist one temptation? 

This is the hardest part because you will feel like you let yourself down.  You’ve worked so hard and beat a handful of binges and then you fall down.  Yes, it sucks, but you have to look to the future, pick yourself back up, and stop dwelling on the binge… I promise that dwelling won’t get you anywhere, except maybe to another binge.

4. Challenge yourself to make a list of everything you want to do in your life. 

It’s really fun to create this wish list and very rewarding when you get to cross off items.  Write down everything you want to do and accomplish throughout your life.  Try to do these things when you beat a binge, as a reward if that will help.  If not, try to cross items off monthly, annually, or just whenever you can complete the activity on your list.  

5. Challenge yourself to vent out any stress, frustration, or anxiety.

While this is not true for everyone, the majority of binge eaters binge due to negative emotions.  Bingeing is comforting to us so that we don’t have to think about our stressful jobs and frustration with friends, family, and even ourselves.  Turning to food was my way to deal with all those things I didn’t want to even think about. 

This challenge gets more difficult because it’s hard to do.  It’s hard to change your habits of bingeing to something else.  BUT, I challenge you to do so by having a plan.  Having a plan in place is the key because you already know that you are going to do xyz when you are tempted to binge. 

The next time you feel a binge coming on, pull out your plan and do it!  If you need to go into your bathroom and take a bubble bath, do it!  If your plan is to write in your journal about your feelings, do it! 

Writing in my journal really worked well for me.  I remember driving through McDonald’s one day without getting anything and I was so mad.  I struggled with not bingeing and buying food to binge on.  In the end, I did go home empty-handed, but I was so angry.  I pulled out my journal and wrote about my anger.  This was so therapeutic for me to do because it allowed my emotions to escape in a healthy and non-destructive way.

Last night I was thinking about all I need to do really provide help for you all on my site.  Rob went to play poker and I had the house to myself.  I was thinking about what I would need from someone that beat binge eating disorder. 

What advice or tools would really help me end the struggle with bingeing?

As I was pondering over this, I remembered what it was like years ago when Rob went out somewhere.  The feelings of bingeing would flood my head and I would be consumed with finding enough food to fill my mouth in the quickest amount of time.  I would leave the house with my keys and my wallet and be on my way. 

Candy.
Chips.
Fast food.
Cookies.

I wanted it ALL. 

When I would come back home with all the food, I would just binge and binge until it was all good.  Don’t get me wrong, satisfaction was sure there, but only for the first few bites.  Throughout the rest of the time eating, I was just going through the motions.  When I was done, I felt guilty.  Sad.  Disappointed.  You name it and I felt it.

Back to last night…  The advice I would give someone now (who was like me and planned the binge as I did) would be to schedule something so that you are not alone. 

Make plans with friends. 
Go for a walk. 
Plan a dinner out with people so that you don’t binge. 
Get a massage. 
Paint your nails. 
Whiten your teeth (you can’t eat or drink with those on)
Take a bath.
Call a friend. 

While all of these things seems obvious, it is harder than it looks.  I was moody and so very grumpy when I took myself out of my binge eating situation.  It was such a fight and a struggle, but I won…  and you can too.  Just give it a try and show yourself that you are worth more than bingeing!

I’d also love to hear what “tricks” you use as distractions from binge eating!  Feel free to leave a comment - You never know who will read it and find it helpful!

I thought it might be fun to include some pictures of my wedding day.  I haven’t gotten a chance to include any in a newsletter, so I thought this would be the perfect place to post! 

I hope you enjoy them!

Husband and Wife!

My Dad, Mom, Me, Rob, and my Brother

Me with my Bridesmaids

Cutting the Cake

Me & my Maid of Honor

Our Last Dance.  It was just us (minus the videographer, photographer, and band).

Rose Petals

In the Rolls Royce after a Perfect Day!

Weightism: Prejudice or discrimmination against people based on weight.  It not only happens with fat people, but skinny ones too. (From urbandictionary.com)

I heard this word for the first time this past Thursday.  I was listening to the radio in my car on the way to run some errands.  The radio station played a recording from a listener that left a message. 

We all know that there are all walks of life out there, but to actually hear someone have such a strong prejudice against an overweight person was really hard for me to hear.  Though I’m far from being overweight, I’m very sensitive to this topic because I used to be very overweight.  I know that there can be different reasons why people are overweight and that’s fine.  Maybe it’s genetic, maybe they have binge eating disorder, maybe they have a really hard life and don’t know where else to turn…

No matter why someone is overweight, there is absolutely NO reason for anyone to make fun of them or to say hurtful things.  No reason. 

The message was left in response to the DJ having a friend that is on this season of The Biggest Loser.  The woman said that it was “disgusting to have a fat friend” and she went on and on.  Can you believe this person?  What kind of a person says things like this?

The most ironic part of the whole thing is that the friend is on The Biggest Loser because she wants to become more healthy.  She obviously realizes that she needs to lose weight and she’s being proactive about it.  How do you knock someone like that?!?

I’m sure many of you are not the kind of people who would ever make fun of someone with weight issues… and that is awesome.  We never know what issues are going on in someone’s life and we are not in the position to ever pass judgement. 

Weightism is something that needs to be put to rest and not be just another thing that people can choose to be prejudice about.

I know there’s been some buzz for a while now about this reality show, but I just watched my first episode last night.  I was at the gym, later than usual, and I put myself on the elliptical right in front of the tv.  Of course, I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but I could read at the bottom of the screen.  It was amazing!  So many people are fighting to get their life back and to lose weight and become healthy - What’s not to love?

Most of the time when I go to the gym, I listen to my iPod.  I try to get distracted by great music and find the extra motivation in it to push myself one more mile.  I will admit that it’s hard for me to focus on the music to get me through cardio at times, but it’s the best thing for me…

Until Tuesday nights when I can watch The Biggest Loser.  If you haven’t tried working out (home or gym) while this is on in the background - try it now!  It was the motivation I needed to sweat my butt off!  No joke.

It reminded me of how much I used to weigh, and how I never want to go back to that place again. 

It showed me that we all have the ability to do whatever we want to do because it comes from within.

It was great to see the people on the show busting their butt to haul 21 tons of plane to be rewarded with letters from their family and friends.  (Seriously, if they can haul a plane, couldn’t I do just 5 more minutes on the elliptical?  You bet I could!) 

I think gyms should play motivating shows like this one on repeat all of the time.  I know I’m not the only one who enjoyed working out while watching it - You should have seen all of the folks around the Biggest Loser TV!  Clearly I was not the only one!

What about you?  Have you worked out while watching this show or another similar one?  Did you find it extra motivating like I did?  If you haven’t, do you think that it would make you push yourself to be faster, better, etc?

You can bet I’ll be at the gym next Tuesday night to tune in to the next episode and watch the sweat pour off my body!

While at the gym today I saw a woman who was probably in her late 40’s and her body was awesome!  Usually when I’m at the gym I do not pay attention to anyone, male or female.  I’m in my own world, listening to my iPod.  This lady was quite the exception though.  Not only did she get my attention, but everyone else’s that was in the gym too. 

I know that there’s a lot of people out who would feel frustrated seeing someone like this… but I’m wondering if there are any of you that actually might find a little motivation in this situation.

I know that when I was binge eating there were days when the gym was fine and there were days when I avoided it like the plague.  Drastic, I know.  Some days I was A-OK with myself and didn’t focus on binge eating.  Some days weren’t so good. 

I hated myself.

I hated my body. 

I hated my neverending struggles with food.  Oh man, I could go on and on…

If I would have seen someone like this when I was still deep in binge eating disorder, I think that it would have made me binge eat even more after I left the gym (on a bad day).  But I’m a different person now…

Today while I was sweating away (and I do mean drenched in sweat), I appreciated how this woman looked.  I mean, it’s obvious that she has spent a lot of time in the gym working out to get her muscles so defined… and I think that’s awesome!  She inspired me to keep on lifting my 30lbs (did arms today) when I wanted to stop (and I was successful, I might add )

I’m curious about your thoughts…  Assuming you have binge eating disorder, if you saw someone that was totally toned and in fabulous shape, how would that make you feel?  Do you feel accepting enough of yourself that it wouldn’t bother you in a negative way, or do you need to work on that part?  Do you think that it would motivate you to end binge eating disorder and move on with your life? 

We are all motivated in different ways, so I just want to know about YOU!

As you might have guessed by now… I really like anything inspirational (quotes, poems, good stories) to get me through any hard times.  I remember taking great pleasure in opening a journal that was full of good motivational things to read to help me when I struggled with binge eating disorder. 

If you are like me, I encourage you to spend some time looking through anything that you draw inspiration from to help with your binge eating journey.  I promise that it helps.

You Can Be Whatever You Want To Be!
by Donna Levine

There is inside you
all of the potential
to be whatever you want to be,
all of the energy
to do whatever you want to do.
Imagine yourself as you would like to be,
doing what you want to do,
and each day, take one step
towards your dream.
And though at times it may seem too
difficult to continue,
hold on to your dream.
One morning you will awake to find
that you are the person you dreamed of,
doing what you wanted to do,
simply because you had the courage
to believe in your potential
and to hold on to your dream.

This poem is definitely one of my favorites!  Even though it wasn’t written for a binge eater, I considered my “dream” to be binge-free and it helped me.  It’s so important to know and realize that all people that binge eat have such great power and potential inside each one of you.  Use the power and create the life you want. 

Rid yourself of binge eating disorder.

Be more social because you aren’t fixated on your next binge.

Know that you can get through anything, good times or bad, without binge eating.

Most importantly, make binge eating disorder a thing of the past!

This post kind of goes along with my post from yesterday…

There are many building blocks with overcoming binge eating.  There are times when you will successfully beat a binge, and there are times when you won’t be so successful.  Sure, the times when you fall will hurt.  Yes, they might even discourage you as well.  Perhaps the most important thing you should do is to realize that a failure is only a failure when you don’t get back up, move towards your goal, and turn it into a success.

Failure is just a word; nothing more.  It doesn’t define you in anyway.  There are many times when I fell down and I’ll be honest, it was very hard to find motivation within myself to get back up.  However, I knew the bigger picture.  I knew that certain times would be tough, but that it was most important that I kept going during those times. 

Each time I overcome falling down, I was moving myself one step closer to really ending binge eating disorder.  Remember you can’t just stop bingeing all at once.  It’s such a gradual process and has to be to ensure that you don’t ever fall back into binge eating patterns in the future.

I know, without one bit of doubt, that I will never binge eat again.  I just can’t possibly go back to that place that controlled me for so long.  Now (and for forever) I will be in control of food. 

I learned about myself each time I fell down and gave into a binge.  I know how hard it is to beat binge eating, and I also know how awesome it is to be freed from it.  Have patience with yourself and also move towards your goal of overcoming binge eating.  I promise that it can be done and that it will feel so good!  Build a strong foundation underneath you so that you will only keep growing stronger and stronger!

I found this poem and I just think it’s so inspirational.  There are so many times when fighting a binge was hard and I just wanted to give up and give in and eat.  This poem wasn’t written specifically for binge eating, but I think that it’s just great and says everything perfectly.  Times will be hard and you will question if it is worth it…  It is most definitely worth it.  Keep going and staying strong! 

 Do Not Quit
Author Unknown

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit -
Rest if you must, but do not quit.
Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit -
It’s when things go wrong that you must not quit.

Many people that binge eat end up living a life without love.

There is so much baggage that comes along with binge eating, which makes it very hard to love yourself.  If you do not have love for yourself, it’s very hard to love anyone else in the way that you should.  Binge Eating Disorder makes a person feel that they are undeserving of love.  It’s very important to start loving yourself unconditionally so that you can begin to live fully.   

The love I’m talking about is unconditional love.  A love and respect for all walks of life, including your own and other’s.  In order to reach this kind of love, we need to let go of the holds that binge eating has on us.  We need to realize that we are all capable of love, regardless of binge eating.  Turn your negative thoughts into positive ones.  If you’ve been hurt by others in the past, let it go and practice forgiving.  Get rid of anything else that binge eating has control over and start living a life with pure love.

Always remember that each one of you is 100% capable of loving unconditionally.  Do not let binge eating disorder ruin your ability on sharing love with others and with yourself!